CHESHBON HANEFESH WORKSHEET - 5780 EDITION

Cheshbon Hanefesh Worksheet

A Personal Inventory for the High Holy Days – 5780 edition

Traditionally, cheshbon hanefesh, literally an accounting of the soul, is undertaken during the Aseret Yamei Teshuvah – the Ten Days of Repentance from Rosh Hashanah through Yom Kippur. The entire month of Elul is even better, but in truth, any time is a good time.

With openness and honesty, giving the benefit of the doubt to yourself without being extravagant, being self-critical without beating yourself up, evaluate the following on an appropriate scale of your choosing. There is no yardstick. Every person is a work in progress – no exceptions!

Keep notes in a diary and add to them all year. These questions/reflections require much more than a mere score. Please feel free to add any topics you wish to evaluate. Consider both quality and quantity. Don’t forget to answer the most important questions of all: How have I improved since last year? In what areas do I need to improve? What are my goals in those areas? What will I do to reach them? Of course, there is no right answer to any of this ….. is there?

The People in My Life

How are my relationships with parents, children, spouses/life partners, other family, friends, neighbors, strangers, employers, employees, customers, teachers, et al.?

Who did I injure? Who injured me? How? Why? Does blame matter?

What did I do to make amends? Was it enough?

What did/can/will I do to assure it doesn’t happen again?

Did I apologize?

Did I ask for forgiveness? Was I forgiven? How do I feel about that? Was I not forgiven? How do I feel about that?

Did I forgive those who asked for forgiveness? How do I feel about them?

Is our relationship the same – better – worse? Reconciliation?

What did I do to heal the people in my life?

Did I help others reconcile with each other? Am I a rodef shalom?

Are there patterns, habits, addictions in my life I need to change? Are there good patterns and habits in my life that I should utilize even more?

Do I really hear and understand other people – their needs, hopes and dreams? How can/do I encourage them? Do I encourage them?

Do I accept others for who they are, even if they aren’t what I want them to be? Do I have the right to want them to be other than who they are?

Lashon Hara/Rechilut – Slander, gossip, offensive speech

            Did I speak/write it?

            Did I read/listen to it?

            Did I prevent others from spreading it?

God in My Life

Is God in my life?

Do I ever contemplate the Divine?

Do I ever contemplate holiness? Can I be holy? Do I see the holiness in other people?

Do I engage in regular prayer and/or meditation?

            Tefillin

            Daily prayer service/private worship

            Bedtime Sh’ma (teach your children well)

            Blessings for Mitzvot

            Blessings for food/drink

Can I really imitate God?

Did I do teshuvah?

Did I forgive God for what happened to me? Can God cause anything to happen to me?
Do I have a personal theology?

Jewish Ritual/Jewish Observance

Kashruth

            Biblical

            Halakhic

            Home

            Out

            Vegetarian

   Vegan

How are my Shabbat and Holy Days (general)?

            Know the stories/reasons

  Candles

            Kiddush

            Family Blessings

            Zemirot – table songs

            Guests

            Refraining from Work

            Attending Services

            Torah Study

            Reflection

            Havdalah

            Fulfilling/meaningful/involved/indifferent

How are my holy days? Do I observe them in some fashion? Do I know what the tradition says? How do I find meaning? 
Specific holy days

            Rosh Hashanah

                        Tashlikh

                        Shofar

            Yom Kippur

                        Fasting

                        Contemplation

                        Teshuvah

            Sukkot

                        Built/ate/studied/slept in a Sukkah

                        Ushpizin – honored visitors

               Lulav and Etrog

            Shemini Atzeret

            Simchat Torah

            Chanukah
                         Chanukiyah/menorah

            Tu BiShevat

            Purim

                        Megillah Reading

                        Shlach Manot

                        Tzedakah

            Pesach

                        Bedikat Chametz

                        Seder

                        No chametz during holiday

            Yom Hashoah

            Yom Ha’atzma’ut

            Shavuot

            Tisha B’Av

            Yizkor – Do I remember them?

Mitzvot – Mitzvah means commandment – or is it a good deed?

            Have I taken on more mitzvot?

            Have I improved my observance of mitzvot I was already doing?

            Have I ceased mitzvot I was already doing?

            How?

            Why?
            Do I find fulfillment in their observance? Am I supposed to?

Judaism - Do I preach it, teach it, live it?

Study

Do I engage in regular Torah study?

Do I read Jewish books and/or periodicals?

What do I know about Judaism generally?

            History

            Holy Days

            Texts – Tanakh, Talmud, Midrash, etc.

            Culture

            Zionism

            Personalities

            Beliefs/tenets/philosophy

            Practices

            Halakhah

            Hebrew language

Israel

The State of Israel

The government of the State of Israel

The people of the State of Israel

The People of Israel (am yisrael) - yes, they are two different things

The Land of Israel

Travel – ever; recently; soon

Support (whatever that means, in whichever way one sees fit)

            How? When? Where? Should these matter?

            Israel Bonds

            JNF

            Israeli products

            Rallies

            Letter writing

            AIPAC

            J Street

            Peace Now

            New Israel Fund

            What do I think about the settlements?

            What do I think about the Occupation?

            What do I think about peace with the Palestinians?

            What do I think about the rabbanut?

Criticize (whatever that means, in whichever way one sees fit)

             How? When? Where? Should these matter?

Zionism - political - types

Zionism - religious - types

Tzedakah/Gemilut Chasadim/Volunteerism

Do I view others as B'tzelem Elohim - in the image of God?

"Tzedek, tzedek tirdof" - Justice, justice you shall pursue

Feed the hungry

Clothe the naked

Defend/care for the stranger in our midst

Hear the cries of others

Charitable donations

            How much tzedakah? (according to Torah and halakhah, tithing [10%] expected)

Donations of Time/Volunteer work

            Congregation

            Other organizations

Donations of Self/gemilut chasadim - acts of lovingkindness

            Bikur cholim - visiting/care for the sick

            Comforting mourners

            Comforting the afflicted

Jewish Community

How active in congregation?

            Affiliates

            Religious school/teaching

How active in other Jewish groups?

Reaching out to other Jews

Captive Jews
What about everybody else?

My Body, My Self

Exercise

Diet

Self-abuse (drugs, alcohol, tobacco)

Self-control

Care of the body

Care of the soul

Care of the mind

What did I do to heal myself?

Take reasonable advantage of the pleasing things in this world – art, music, good food and drink, travel, etc.

The Physical World Around Me

The environment – b’al tashchit – do not destroy; cleanup; conservation; global warming

Kindness to animals

Stop and smell the roses/meditate on the wonder of Creation?

Tikkun olam?

A Few Final Thoughts for Your Consideration

Do I deserve another year because I have been good?

Do I deserve another year because I will be better? I promise!

Am I prepared to do teshuvah, tefillah and tzedakah?

© Rabbi Richard Flom - 2019